


Survivor No More

by devinwrites



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, Supercorp fallout, post 5x07
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-18
Updated: 2019-11-18
Packaged: 2021-02-08 13:24:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 668
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21476731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/devinwrites/pseuds/devinwrites
Summary: Prompt from vox-ex on tumblrOkay, but what if after everything, Kara still guilty and broken over what happened with Lena, finds the Monitor and demands that it be her who should have to die instead during Crisis. She tries to convince him that Oliver was wrong, that she isn't the best of them, that she is no more angry and flawed than he is. He asks her why she would be so willing to die now after having been through so much in her life, but she just looks at him and tells him that she doesn't deserve to be the one who survives this time.
Comments: 6
Kudos: 39





	Survivor No More

**Author's Note:**

> The time has come for Earth 38 to be tested.
> 
> But this time is different. This time, the hero knows what is coming before it even begins.
> 
> And she has already decided how to stop it.

Kara goes in search of The Monitor the moment she realizes that the chaos reigning downtown is The Test.

She finds him in a rundown apartment in the bad part of town and enters, without a second thought.

"I know what needs to be done," She announces, her face stoic. "I am here. I am ready."

"I am not aware of what you mean, Supergirl."

A look of disgust settles across her face. Her usually cheerful eyes, dull, almost angry. "Do. Not. call me /that/." She demands. Dejectedly, she continues, "I don't deserve that title."

"Well, that certainly isn't what Oliver Queen told me last time we met." The god pauses, reflecting thoughtfully. "Infact, Mr. Queen spoke /very/ highly of you and Mr. Allen."

"He was wrong about me. I am nowhere near the same level as Barry. And Oliver isn't as bad as he makes himself out to be."

The Monitor remains silent, fully taking in the woman standing before him.

She looks small. Sad, no dejected. Defeated. A far cry from the confident hero he had encountered on Earth-1. Her arms crossed over her chest, hugging herself, as though trying to keep herself from falling apart.

So he prompts, "Why did you come to me, Kara Zor-el? What do you wish to ask of me?"

She takes a deep breath, pauses, sighs, then speaks. "I know that a hero must die in this Crisis. It wouldn't be called Crisis if everything ended well. And I have a strong suspicion that when Oliver talked to you last time, he traded his life for Barry's and mine."

The Monitor opens his mouth to speak, but Kara quickly continues.

"I'm sure he gave you some speech about how he is full of darkness and Barry and I are good. But he was wrong about me. I am not good." She drops her head, but not before the tears begin to form in the corners of her eyes.

"I am dark and angry and flawed. I am constantly trying to fight the rage inside."

"The rage that has been building in me ever since I was 13. Of being losing everyone. Of not having a choice. Of watching everything I know and love cease to exist. Of being alone." As she lists of the reasons for her rage her voice quiets, until it is little more than a whisper.

The Monitor nods. None of this is a surprise to him. After all, he /is/ an omnicient being. 

Kara continues, "Oliver is so strong. He has been through so much, and he is an excellent example of the resilience of the human race. He is a natural leader and he never asks his team to do anything that he himself wouldn't do. Honestly, most of the time, he gives himself the most dangerous tasks. Because he can't stand the thought of putting someone he cares about at risk."

"He is a perfect example of how humans can take the darkest, most painful experiences and turn them into a force for change. A force for good."

She pauses a moment, contemplating what she has said. Then she shrugs, "Sure, he has his flaws and weaknesses, but that is what makes him real. That is what makes him human."

The Monitor waits a beat, making sure she is done talking, before he speaks.

"And why, Kara Zor-el, are you so eager to trade places with Mr. Queen? You too have been through so much and yet you continue to fight. You continue to help others. You continue to protect everyone."

"Not everyone." She interjects quietly. "Not everyone."

"So now you think that you should be the one to die? After everything you have been through? After all that you have survived, you want to give up now?"

She looks up at him, tears in her eyes. When she speaks, her voice breaks. "I have betrayed and destroyed the one closest to me. I don't deserve to be the one to survive this time."


End file.
